Dear Don,

You may want to discuss this issue with your physician to determine if you have any erectile dysfunction (ED) as a result of a physical problem such as with your prostate. ED is common for many men, but the nature of the cause differs. For some, it is a side effect of a medication.....antidepressants are known to have significant effect on sexual function and drive.

Once your doctor has ruled out any physical problem, you may want to discuss trying Viagra. Unless you have a history of heart disease, Viagra has been found to be very safe and effective when taken as directed. It helps to achieve and maintain erection which in turn can help prevent premature ejaculation. For some, Viagra has been found to maintain erection even AFTER ejaculation. You can discuss with your doctor if Viagra might be an option for you.

For premature ejaculation, there are methods that can be used to desensitize the penis which can significantly delay the ejaculatory response without compromising your pleasurable experience. A topical lidocaine cream can provide this type of effect. Again, you can discuss this option with your doctor as well.

Another thing you can try at home to prevent premature ejaculation is to have yourself or your partner stimulate you to ejaculation about 1 to 2 hours BEFORE you plan to have sex with your partner. Many men are able to better control and / or delay ejaculation the 2nd time after having that 1 to 2 hours of refractory period in between ejaculations.

One last thing to keep in mind is that putting the stress and pressure on yourself can psychologically cause you to have difficulty maintaining erection or premature ejaculation. By not allowing yourself to become anxious over the anticipation of having premature ejaculation or inability to maintain an erection can also help you overcome this. Talking with your partner can be of help, too. Your partner's understanding and patience can put you at ease and give them an opportunity to suggest some other things you can do to help your partner achieve climax. Discussing these things with your partner and welcoming their input may help BOTH of you enjoy a more pleasurable experience while taking some of the "pressure" off of you.

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